!!! That's all I can say!!

Dec 5, 2008

Wow. Oh man. Oh boy. Oh my. Well, I'm short of words. Let me try... Oh my boy. Wait, that didn't come out right, did it? Tee hee... Guess not...! It's just I'm so super happy! I'm REALLY going to the U.S.! Not for a week. For TWO weeks! But it's 27 (!) hours flight... Ugh. Not looking forward to THAT! Who would?!

I'm going crazy. I need to know whether David will be there. If I get to see him... Oh the things that would run through my head. Man. I need an autograph. I'm (not) gonna ask him to sign my face. And my hand. And my shirt. Haha, nah. I'll just get him to autograph one of my poems for me. Oh, the joy I'd feel to have his handwriting scrawled onto mine. Oh, my head's gonna explode, but who cares? But I doubt I'll see him...! I wanna cry. But... there's still hope. Hope. There's a character in Relapse! named Hope. Hope is what David gave me. Hope is all I need.

I also want to see Zac. I've never really told anyone this but... Zac means a lot to me... If you so much as suggest that's he's gay, well, let's just say I'll attack you. And call my Archies (trust me, they'll help me) to attack you too!!

Gah, am I the only one who didn't know about 'luscious Olivia'?! Oh David. *Shake head miserably* MUST you call her luscious? I want to puke at the thought of him saying the word. At the same time it makes me LOL so bad I ache! The Archies are kinda torn over the possibility of David liking some girl: the male Archies (yeah, that's seriously what we call them. They're a rare species) think it's great, that he's growing up and all that load of blah, but us, the female Archies are mostly sad... As for me! When I saw it my heart just kinda... I literally felt it sink!! :( I'm sad. Oh well, that's what I wrote 'Never' for...


Never thought we were meant to be,

But a lurch in my heart,

Kept me from giving up,

‘Cause even a shimmer of hope,

Is enough to carry on,

Told myself,

Just forget it, it’ll never happen,

I’ll wind up with my heart in the dust,

Amongst the hundreds you’ve already broken,

Our hearts, torn and forlorn,

These things you’ll never discern,

Yet as I said those words,

I felt my heart in my throat,

Thought of those hazel eyes,

That mesmerizing voice and I knew,

We’ll never be able to forget you,

You brought laughter into our lives,

Tears of happiness, tears of joy,

Telling you, the last time I will,

Never forget what we’ve done for you,

Friendships lost, precious moments missed,

All for you, but you broke our hearts,

We knew it’d happen one day,

Just never thought it’d be so soon,

Thousand arms out wide, all ready for you,

To give you all that you need,

Many things we’ve done for you,

Many times our fingers ached,

We stood together through the rough times,

Just to make sure that you were happy,

Didn’t care if you knew,

So caught in the moment,

But now I’m feeling the rue,

Can’t say I regret it,

Just wish you knew more than you do,

Never's my word,

‘Cause it’s my feelings in one,

Never, something that will never be,

Never, you’ll never know,

Never, I just never thought it’d be so soon. ~

Oh, David. I feel bad that I actually wrote a poem about that but... My feelings about this subject are fluctuating constantly and I need them to just calm down and let me take a breather.